When you first start planning your wedding, it can feel like everyone has an opinion. Pinterest boards, family traditions, and even well-meaning friends can create a sense that you have to do things a certain way. But here’s the truth: there’s no single “right” way to plan a wedding.

To help you create a calmer, more joyful journey, here are three wedding planning myths you can let go of right now, because "right" is what feels true to the two of you. This is your day so it is ok to make what the two of you want THE priority.

Myth 1: You Have to Follow Tradition

From bouquet tosses to matching outfits, many couples feel pressure to include traditions they don’t actually connect with. The reality? Your wedding day should reflect you — your values, your story, your love.

If a tradition feels meaningful, keep it. If it doesn’t, give yourself permission to skip it. A wedding built on authenticity will always feel more memorable than one built on obligation. To put it into even sharper perspective the only MUST DO things are covered off by your celebrant, specifically the legal paperwork, the legal wording and your legal vows. Everything else is ENTIRELY up to the two of you, yes, it can be anything you want it to be.

This includes the rings, you don't have to exchange them. Personal vows, you don't have to say them. The only thing you both have to say is the legal vows which your celebrant will guide you through this (PS: it is a very simple sentence that you can repeat after your celebrant).

Myth 2: Tiny Details Mean Better Wedding Plans

It’s easy to think that every tiny detail matters — the napkins, the favours, the exact shade of flowers. While details can be lovely, they aren’t what makes your day unforgettable. What your guests will remember is the love, the laughter, and the way the day felt. Fewer moving parts often means less stress and more presence. Focus on what truly matters, and let the rest be optional.

For the things that truly matter, by this I mean those non-negotiable things you want to include and have happen in your wedding, communicate them to your vendors for delivery and delegate on-the-day decisions and co-ordination to someone you trust. This someone is the person who will make sure your non-negotiables happen, someone who can work with your vendors to make sure your priorities are prioritised so the two of you can focus on enjoying your moment together.

Myth 3: Bigger Means Better

Big weddings can be beautiful, but so can small and intimate ones. What matters isn’t the guest count — it’s that you feel supported, celebrated, and calm on your day. Whether it’s 20 people or 200, the magic comes from the connection, not the size. This can be one of the biggest stress points for couples, the guest list. Deciding who to invite can stir up expectations, family pressure, and even guilt. But remembering your wedding is about you and your partner makes this process a little lighter. Here are some ways to prioritise with calm and clarity:

1. Start with Your Inner Circle

   • Ask: Who are the people we can’t imagine not being there?

   • Begin with immediate family, chosen family, and your closest friends.

2. Think About Energy, Not Obligation

   • Surround yourselves with people who bring support, warmth, and joy.

   • Release the pressure to invite out of duty (like distant relatives you rarely see).

3. Create “Tiers” of Priority

   • Tier 1: Must-haves (your nearest and dearest).

   • Tier 2: Would love to have, if space allows.

   • Tier 3: Nice to have, but not essential.

4. Consider Your Guest Experience

   • A smaller, more intimate group can often feel calmer and more connected.

   • Remember: more guests = more logistics, more cost, and often more stress.

5. Be Gentle But Clear with Families

   • If parents or relatives are contributing financially, they may want input.

   • Be open to their suggestions, but stay clear on your boundaries.

The Takeaway: Prioritise things that add joy not pressure.

Your wedding is about marrying the person you love. Everything else like the traditions, the styling, the extras, are all choices, not requirements. By letting go of myths and pressures that don’t serve you, you make space for calm, joy, and authenticity.

Ready for a Calmer Planning Journey?

Want to focus on what really matters? I’ve created a simple Calm Wedding Checklist to help you stay organised, grounded, and stress-free. Because your wedding should feel like love — not like pressure. 💕